Dating

 Hey Everyone!

I hope you guys are having a fantastic week. Last week, We had a discussion about dating, along with the importance of dating others with the same values and culture. What I really loved about our discussions was that dating doesn't have to be just a commitment with spending time with one person, but it's really defined as a way of getting to know people one on one, by doing it with multiple different people. Which was a really awesome. 

The Culture in the united states is that dating with someone is often a serious one on one. It is exclusive with that significant other. The definition shared in family relations really helped me to understand that dating can be simple be just getting to know one another and being open with one another. Which was something I liked. As we talked about dating, A chart was placed up that had four main categories.

 Knowledge, trust, commitment and Touch. This chart was from a book called "How to avoid falling in love with a Jerk" by John Van Epp. He discussed about the importance of getting to know your dates, before advancing to trusting, committing and "physical touch" (Meaning holding hands) What I really loved was that he evaluated that touch can often misinterrupt true feelings and knowledge of an individuals, because marriage after dating is whole different ball game. Dating done right, often reveals the true nature of an individual and their real thoughts and feelings. What I really loved about dating was a way of getting to know a person, without fully agreeing to committing to an exclusive relationship with them. That it's really just a way of getting to know them, and understanding their true thoughts and feelings. 


Dating in the Fijian community from what i heard is not really a problem, but definetly isn't really talked about as young teenagers. The Dating talk is often brushed off, or talked to us at an earlier age, but not really explored. The Church's influence to me (as a Fijian) is a very huge part of my own culture. So I really can't speak for everyone. For instance the Church's stance of group dating while 16 and one on one dating while 18 is one part of church culture that's huge in my life. 


Knowing Fijian outside the church, Sometimes Fijian teenagers will often date people behind there parents back or unwillingly tell them later when the relationship gets serious. This is mostly true in the "states" (the United states to be short.  It's a really interesting thing to think about now that I know think about it. Dating and Marriage though highly prioritized in fijian family homes are often not really dicussed about or talked about with individuals such as teenagers, and young adults. Which is why I am so grateful for the church  in my life, especially prophets and appostles. Recently we had a appostle give a talk about the importance of marriage, family and dating as young single adults. I really loved how President Oaks talked about getting out there to date and spend time more with our families. He talked about dating being an activity to get to know your "potential" spouse and to avoid hanging out. He talked about a date being three things 1). Planed, 2). Paid for, 3). Paired off. I really loved how all these three terms really connect to the divine responsibilities of the father in the family proclamation which are to protect, provide and preside over the family. Along with the talk of starting each and every date with a prayer. Prayer has been such an important part of my life, and I am so grateful that the blessing of the oppurtunity to talk to god and ask for guidance on who to date and marry is extended to all of us.

This is Meli signing off!


Also here's the link to the Adult devotional https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wull4cTXUTk

Please  watch it! There is so many good and helpful tips on dating.


Also if you need a definition of marriage and families.

The Link to the family proclamation is below.

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/the-family-a-proclamation-to-the-world/the-family-a-proclamation-to-the-world?lang=eng

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